Stop, Look, and Listen

This blog has gone silent for a while. I’ve been on a long, emotional roller coaster that so many singles find themselves on. There were thrilling highs, followed by heart-in-your-stomach drops. As I stumbled off the dizzying ride, I found myself at a crossroads in life. At the edge of this intersection, I decided to follow the words I was taught as a child before crossing the street: Stop, Look, and Listen.

Like any child, I wanted to run across the street. I wanted to get to the other side of this mess. I was so tempted to immediately make a big life change. Move? Quit my job and travel? Go to school? Instead of running away, I took some very purposeful time to move forward in the most healthy and God directed I knew how.

At most intersections, there are stop signs—shaped like octagons. One of my longest known and dearest friends came up with the Octagon Theory years ago. The theory was that an eligible bachelor for a Christian woman must have eight specific qualities. These qualities made up the eight sides of an octagon, which was supposed to represent a complete man, ready for marriage. I remember that the theory was that a person could have 6 or 7 sides, but unless they had all 8 sides, they were simply not a viable candidate for dating or marriage. I decided years ago, when the theory was developed, that instead of focusing on finding my Octagon man, I should be focused on becoming the complete person a man like that would need and be looking for as a partner. Of course, I’ve too often strayed from that goal, but it has been my desire—to be a complete person, not lacking of any “sides.” (For UFC and WWF fans, the struggle within The Octagon might be a good topic for future posts or comments.)

After stopping, the next step is to look. “Look both ways before you cross the street.” As God continues to hammer out my metal into the shape He has intended, He’s forced me to look at my own “sides.” I’m taking long, hard looks at my character, personality, and relationships.

And finally, I’m listening. These steps have happened simultaneously and are not in order of importance. But, in past life-intersections, I think I’ve too often skipped this one. This time God used a blizzard that shut me in my apartment for a week to force me to cry out to Him and ask “God, what are you trying to say to me?” And then really listen for His answer.

I was definitely a chicken. I was scared to cross the street. But why did this chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Psalm 84:56 sayBlessed are those whose strength is in you, who have set their hearts on pilgrimage. As they pass through the Valleys “ of Baca, they make it a place of springs.” Baca means “weeping,” but the joyful expectation of pilgrims transforms difficult ways into refreshment.

Signage

I still remember the first time I heard the word "signage." I was interning at an event coordinating firm after my Freshman year of college and the President of the company told me in a meeting that we needed to work on signage for an event. I am pretty sure I laughed. I thought she was trying to sound hip. It sounded like something my Uncle Russ would say (he can make anything sound "gnarly" cool and frequently ends words with "age.") -- not something a power business woman would say in front of the mayor. But apparently signage is a real and commonly used word.

I guess I've spent the years since then asking God for some signage. Earlier this week, I was begging God to give me some kind of sign. "Show me where you want me! Where should I move? Or should I stay here? What should I do with my life?!"

The next sign I passed was HUGE. In my face. "CLEVELAND."

What???! Haha... Yeah right. God, you can be a jokester sometimes!

I think God was reminding me that he doesn't always lay out His plan for us. Yes, some people get these grand signs, but sometimes he lets us choose. I may get a sign between now and this winter, when I'll be making my decision on where (or whether) to move, but I might not. I might have to just trust that He will be with me through the decision making process. I've always thought of my life as already being mapped out in this master plan that God has set for me, but I actually think I have lots of options. I'm not going to move to the wrong place or take the wrong job or marry the wrong person. I don't think the plan is like that. Maybe-- just like the way I like to make the plans for myself-- His plan is fluid too.

Jeremiah 29:11 gets quoted all the time:
"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

But we don't always read verses 12...
"Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you."

A couple thoughts:
--"Plans" is plural. He has multiple plans for us. Not just one. I'm reminded of the Choose Your Own Adventure books I used to love as a kid.

--My pleas to Him are not falling on deaf ears. He is listening to me. And communicating with me, even if it is in the form of a joke!